lean on me too

If someone asks,


"What did you learn the hard way until now?"


I believe most people would say,


"You can't rely on anyone but yourself"
"In the end, you only have yourself"
"You are your own hero"


I was like that too in the past, until someone said this to me,


"You can't walk alone. And neither am I. We need each other. If you can do it all by yourself, that's great. But isn't it much better if you can do it not by yourself?"


That words made me realize.

Wouldn't it be better if you have someone you can trust, someone you can rely on, without feeling like you are burdening them?

Wouldn't it be better knowing at the end of your horrible day, you can turn to someone, you can share what you've been through that day?

Wouldn't it be better to have someone by your side? Knowing you will always have a shoulder to cry on, a pair of ears to listen to all your rants and stories, and a hand to hold you when you feel it's been too much?

My advice for you is, please rely on someone. Even when you feel you can withstand it. Even when you feel you're strong enough.

Please be indebted to someone. Please let someone know what you've been through until now. Please let someone know you're not okay and you can't stand it anymore. Please let someone hold you when you feel like breaking apart.

And please, don't let yourself walk alone on that lonely road.


In life, sometimes you become indebted to others or you inconvenience others. It happens. Everyone lives like that. Don’t suffer too much on your own.

Because in the end, what helps you overcome obstacles isn’t brains, but someone who will take your hand and never let you go.

in order to love
you have to love
not someone
but yourself first

- put yourself first no matter what

Maturing my way out of life

*cue to the enthusiastic music*

Guess who's back!
I'm sure there's no audience waiting for my update on this site, but yeah I'll act like it
........just in case someone is looking at my twitter account and find this site

I went through all of my old posts, only to realize that I've been soooo mature and wise for someone with the age of sixteen-ish. But really, I'm so damn proud of you, my old self (this is where I give myself a pat on the back).

I'm nearing my 20 now, and wOw, time surely feels like it's flying at high speed.

I'm in the beginning of my 3rd year in university. The best advice I can give is: do enjoy your time with uni life. It is once in a lifetime, yes, and it would be such a waste if you take it for granted. Go outside of your comfort zone, as they always say. But this one's true. Nothing can be any truer. Uni life gives your life a very different perspective. It teaches you to stand strong on your own. It teaches you to be considerate of other people. It teaches you to always be present wherever and whenever you are. It teaches you that failure is just one step closer to success. It teaches you to be fearless. Basically, it teaches you literally anything you want to learn. So please don't just sit in your room after class has ended. Go mingle, find some adventure, and spread your wings, little bird!

You know what, being 20 actually scares me. 20 is a big number. This is where you actually start to be an adult, with real responsibility waiting ahead. This is the age when you start to think about the future. Your future. What will you do when you graduate from university, where will you work, what do you want to be in the future, will you find the right one for you, when will you plan on getting married, et cetera et cetera. All of these thoughts has been on my mind for a couple of weeks. I try not to think about it, but well, what can I do if I'm not going to think about it?
But maybe I don't have to think about it, not now at least. Maybe the best way to fight these thoughts is to just go with whatever life throws at you and figure everything out on the way. Isn't this so much easier to do? (no actually you still need a game plan just in case something unexpected happens).



I was laying on my bed this morning, scrolling through my phone reading some kindness story on steller. It made me want to share my own, so here it is.

Not too long ago, I went to the airport to pick my mom up with my father and sisters. My father asked me to go to the ATM with him because he needed to withdraw some money in my card. So I went with him.
I walked behind a guy who brought a big suitcase with him. The guy happened to go to the ATM too. I saw him struggling to open the door in front of me, so I did the only thing I could think of. I opened the door for him. He seemed startled by this and said thank you to me. I replied you're welcome with a small smile, mainly because I also was startled because of my act lol. I realized this is the kind of kindness story people used to share. And I actually did it!

Shortly, I was happy I could help that guy even if it's just opening the door for him.


Now my question is,
will you help me to spread kindness to others?

Untuk gadis bermuka manis
Yang menyimpan segenggam kisah pahit dan tangis
Di antara hujatan dunia yang bengis
Percayalah pada rentetan syair yang dengan cinta ditulis

Dunia mungkin tak seindah sastra
Tak sedamai maya
Dunia mungkin memberi banyak luka
dan sandiwara yang tak pernah sempurna

Tapi, Nak
Selalu ada alasan mengapa kita jatuh dan kalah
Selalu ada alasan mengapa hati harus menyerah
Karena pilihan yang dunia berikan tak pernah salah

Kamu tak perlu ragu
Ataupun merunduk malu
Kamu hanya perlu tau

Bahwa kamu lebih dari pantas untuk bertahan dan dipertahankan
Bahwa kamu lebih dari pantas untuk berjuang dan diperjuangkan
Karena baik kamu sadar atau abaikan...

Dunia membutuhkanmu lebih dari yang kau fikirkan

-KLA-


Surakarta, 7 September 2015

Wishful Thinking

Does it ever occur to you when you look at someone
Sit there and drown in their own way of thinking
Probably contemplating about life and such
When you look in their eyes, you could see the light seems so dim
And you wish, in that exact time, that you could fix that and replace it with something else
Promising them that everything will be alright
Because you know, and really hope you're right about one thing
That tomorrow's promises remain to be more beautiful
Than yesterday's shadows

Took me long enough

Isn't it silly how I found myself re-reading my blog posts again? I don't think that I was that person who wrote it all. Yes, back then I really love reading and writing -not that it had stopped-. I even wrote a story on wattpad and found myself amused of my writing, but sadly I didn't continue the story. Not even publishing it. I just keep that little things about writing and stuff to myself. I am surprised, really.

After debating long enough, I decided to write again. If I have time too, of course. And maybe share some of it in here just like what I have done a couple of minutes ago.

Writing and reading help me so much to keep myself up. These two things help me pouring all my emotions out into some sentences. I can't help that my writing isn't that good, but you'll see a part of me through it and I think that is a good thing. To know more about me (I'm referring this sentence to myself).

Unfortunately, and as far as I know, I'm not the person who is good at showing emotions through actions, talks, and gestures. I hardly move when everyone is busy running. And I don't easily say what is going on in my mind. I simply just keep it all to myself until I'm full of it and reluctantly start asking someone for help. But writing; it saves me from drowning in the deep of my mind and helps me find the surface again.

And when I already wrote it, trust me I meant it and I sincerely meant it since I couldnot find my voice to utter the words.

no regret

Do you still remember
When everything started
It seems like
The best that we ever had

Do you still remember
All the sleepless nights we had
Thinking tomorrow is just another good day

Do you still remember
The goodnights and goodmornings
Slowly gave an effect to us
Thinking that this
Was the right thing to do

But what I remember
The most was
When it all
ended

And it feels so good

When I try to remember it all again
As I say to myself
You have made the right decision